Well, it's been quite a while since I've been back on here writing and commenting, but I figured I would reunite with my blog and begin to write again. My hiatus found me spending a lot of time on myspace, but the blogging on there just doesn't have the same aesthetic beauty as it does on here. I guess I feel that I can be deeper on this piece, whereas my myspace profile is pretty much for laughs.
Lately I've been feeling very much alone. Mainly because the dorm is now closed and only summer school is in session, so there's only myself and the women's RD living in the dorm. The campus is so vacant and slow. It's like a ghost town with only the most random of souls wandering about the campus. Moreover, it seems that I have fallen out of the "loop" with some of my friends for reasons I don't really know, but they don't invite me to hang out with them anymore. And when confronted about this they pretend like it's nothing, and that they didn't plan to hang out, and that it was spontaneous, but that's BS.
So, once again, I'm dealing with this concept of loneliness and trying to be at peace with spending time by myself. It's difficult because I really am a social butterfly, but at times I can be very secluded, but even during these times I know deep down I'd rather be out-and-about. It's also weird because I have now been at this job longer then any of my previous ones before and I'm getting itchy. Not that I want to leave because I do like my job, but I want to see what else is out there. I have "job A.D.D." because I can't stay at any job too long without getting bored of it and wanting to do something else. Many of my jobs have been summer jobs so they were destined to be short from the beginning. I can't really see myself being in AZ much longer. At least not Phoenix. I don't really like it here, and the heat just makes it worse. I miss the beach...
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
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