This has been something that has boggled my mind for sometime now. I just don't get it. How do guys who can only be described as the nickname for Richard get quality girls??? I mean, I know quite a few girls that are definite quality girls, but they date total A-holes. Nice guys always get jacked, and when I ask girls why this is, the answers I received are so ridiculous it makes my head hurt. My favorite one is that "usually girls do realize that their b/f is a jerk, but they know he has a good side and they care about him so they try to change him, but that doesn't usually work."
Well isn't that peachy. So let me get this straight: A guy is a jerk, but he's isn't a jerk towards the girl, which makes him fake and two-faced. The girl realizes this, and, instead of tossing him and finding a better guy, she tries to change him. But the guys out there who aren't jerks, the guys who are well-rounded individuals, get screwed. Isn't that lovely?
Ladies, ladies, ladies, just because a guy is nice to you, and pursues you doesn't mean you should date him. If you know he's a jerk, but nice to you, it will only be a matter of time before that is turned towards you. HE IS NOT GOING TO CHANGE!!! Please don't settle for these losers. You deserve better...
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The problem is that most girls would rather be with a jerk than with no one. And since the nice guys seem to have trouble stepping up and asking, the jerks are the ones who tend to get the girls. The thing about the bad guys is that when they are nice to you, you know they are interested because they aren't nice people. With the nice guys, they're nice to everyone, so you can never really tell if they're interested in you or if they're acting like that just because they're nice guys. It can be quite frustrating. I feel like I haven't finished this thought, but I can't think of what else to say. I'll add more later if it comes to me.
But thats just as sad. To settle for something that is less then what you derserve from fear of having nothing at all. And even if the jerk guy shows interest, why accept that?
I would just like to clarify by saying that I have never dated a guy simply to not be alone. This is evidenced in the fact that I have never dated anyone. Still waiting for the right one to come along. That being said, being alone is scary, especially when 99% of the people around you are hooking up like crazy. It's not just about the fear of being alone. That's a big part of it, but the desire to be with someone is strong & that makes it hard to turn someone down even if you know they're not right for you. When you're not with someone you start playing mindgames with yourself, thinking maybe you're not good enough. And worse than that you worry about what other people think. Often dating is just a facade put on for other people. And even though we shouldn't put our worth in what other people think of us, it's hard not to do so.
Well I understand not being alone, and the whole dating facade, but for me it always seems like girls bitch and moan about how guys don't take initative and don't pursue, and I'm not like that at all. I pursue and get rejected, and it's not even the rejection part that's bad, it's who they end up with that makes us nice guys feel horrible. They turn us down and then go out with a-holes, and that is quite upsetting. And for most nice guys when we've been rejected multiple times we just give up because we know how it will end. I need to listen to some Dashboard...:)
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