Remember when you were young, say 3, 4, or 5, and becoming friends with somebody was so simple and easy. There were no preconditions or judgments, you just automatically became friends with whatever kid you ran into regardless of race or looks.
I observed this while at a Carl's Jr this weekend. A little girl was standing in line with her mom when another little girl (who looked like Dora the explorer) came in with her mother. The first girl was white, the second was Mexican, and instantly they became friends. They started chatting about whatever it is that 3 year-olds chat about, and they ran about the restaurant playing until their mothers called them away to eat their food.
I remember being a child and making friends everywhere I went. Even if I never saw them again because I met them at the park or beach, they were still my friends. As a child, the way somebody looked had no influence on my choice to be their friend. I was their friend because they were like me, a kid. Somewhere amidst my growing up I lost that innocence.
I guess as we get older and become "educated" we become much more judgmental and elitist. We pass judgment before we even get to know somebody based on their race or looks, and I know that I've done it plenty of times. If only we could all become little kids again...
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28 comments:
White Stripes- We're Going to Be Friends
Perhaps the rules of making friends change because the rules of being friends change. After all, running about Carl's Jr when you're 22 is hardly acceptable. Not that I agree with such standards of acceptable social behavior, it's just how the world is. I vote we work to change that. Kids are awesome, adults could stand to learn a lot from them.
I don't know what you're talking about Ronnie. Kids are overrated. I hate them.
Well Pete, you certainly have just raised your stock with the ladies out there.
I agree azz that the standard of frienship changes, but I was talking moreso about the initial contact between two people
Azina hates kids too! She told me!
Hmm, I'm no good with this initial contact thing you speak of, being largely afraid of talking to people I don't know. And even some I do, like Pieter, you never know what the hell he's gonna say. Yes, my well guarded secret is now out, I do in fact hate children. It is of course the reason he & I are friends, such a strong common bond of ill will toward all manner of progeny. (You should hear about what he does to puppies.) So the friend thing, I think that the initial contact changes as a result of the standards of friendship changing. No longer is it, can I have fun with this person for one day and maybe never see them again? It's can I have a meaningful relationship with this person that could possibly last the rest of my life? With this focus shift we start looking for things we have in common with people, bonds that we can share so that we can find those life long kind of people. Not to say that our initial impressions are always good and right. Afterall, when Pieter first commented on my blog, I thought hey maybe he is a good person I should try to get to know. Of course now I realize the troublemaking fiend he truly is. Anyway, at the end of the day there isn't enough time to try & get to know everyone with whom we could possibly be friends, this is not to say that we are not missing out on some great people because of our stupid judgments, but I think the people who are meant to be in our lives will always find a way in, even if it is by stalking.
Hey azz are you trying to post a blog on my blog or something? Captain LongAss Blog Comment!
Well, if that's how it's gonna be, I'll just take my comments and go home. :P
You're going to lose two of your four readers if you don't start kissing up a little more. We're not going to put up with your crap much longer.
I only read and post as a favor to your blog. Okay, I'm lying. I actually enjoy it sometimes. Okay, I enjoy it. Maybe I even enjoy your teasing. Hey, it's some human interacation...we don't see other people much out in the cuts.
For real. Wait there's 4 now? If you hope to up your readership you should probably not chastise those who make an attempt to engage in a meaningful dialogue about what you've written.
Or, when you were that age, you could just walk right up to someone and say, "You wanna be friends?" and they'd shrug and be like, "Okay, cool." And so it went. My friend was telling me today that his next door neighbor, who was black, had a flat-top, and he wanted one too, but being Indian, his hair wouldn't "go like that," and he was crushed, and didn't understand. How lovely it would be if we could see things with the eyes of a child sometimes...especially those things that don't make a difference as to whether or not you can see them.
Oooh look at that, another reader! See you guys threaten to leave, and another reader is provided.
But seriously, my blog is like the Hotel California,
"You can check out anytime you like, but you can't never leave". Muhahaha.
Welcome Fayza to my blog.
Fayza...run while you can! The only thing worse is having to listen Azina complain about slamming her poor little thumb in a door. There was something else on her blog I think but I don't remember what it was.
Oh and i only kicked one puppy. and it already had a limp anyway so i couldn't have done much damage.
In case there was any question, Pieter is a sweet & sensitive guy. Not only does he hate children and kick puppies (more than just the one time), he also mocks my pain. Any interested girls out there will have to get in line.
You two need to simmer down. Perhaps you need a heart2heart convo. It helps to use "I" statments, such as: I feel that you mock my pain. etc. etc.
Holy crap! Ronnie, I seriously laughed for 5 minutes. Hilarious. Don't worry, it was all in good fun. Honestly, Pieter is awesome & the girl he ends up with will have to be someone amazing & she will be so lucky. In spite of his hatred, I have no doubt that he would be absolutely wonderful with children. And that puppy thing was complete slander as far as I know, I am not privy to any sort of puppy violence tendencies he may or may not possess.
"I" feel that....i don't really kick puppies. I, in fact, would like to own my very own puppy one day. Own my very Own.....i like sound of that phrase....any comments on it?
I feel that "own my very own" is an oddly sounding phrase, though there probably aren't many better ways of saying it. I too would like to own a dog, but not a puppy, I want to wait until someone else has gone to all the trouble of training so I won't have puppy urine all over my house. I'll dog sit for you though, if after all of this you can trust that I would cause no harm to your puppy. I would never hurt a dog. A cat on the other hand is a completely different story . . .
Hey Ronnie you should re-blog so we can start fresh with a new slanderous topic
Woo for new slander!
This must be a record for the greatest amount of comments totally unrelated to the original post:) You guys are cracking me up..thanks. Azina, I think we should be friends...we both get picked on by Ronnie and Pieter and we keep coming back for more. Ha. And, you sound like a fun friend. Funny how Ronnie's jerky blog is become a place for making friends.
yes, Ronnie, I know I wrote "become" instead of becoming. I didn't read it until after I posted. So, shoot me :)
Well you don't have to use "becoming" because actually it has "become" a place already. So you should have said "Funny how Ronnie's blog HAS become", and Sherry will still don't know what the "cuts" are.
ah, to be young again
I know that I post this at the risk of fueling the posting rivalry between you and my sister (aziner). But I felt the need to respond to your sentiment. Elitism is what makes life worth living. It is what makes America great. Sure when taken to extremes elitism becomes ridiculous such as when it takes on the form of racism, scholarship recipient selection, etc. But I think that we can all agree that joining in chorus with those whom travel in your circle to deride someone who is different from you bears with it a feeling that is unparalleled in any other activity. Perhaps the greatest thing about elitism, my new friend, is that it gives us the chance to be wrong, to discover that someone who doesn't fit our mold is worth our time, and in recognizing this we strive for the betterment of mankind. We realize that what is good and right about people is much greater and perhaps simpler than we had ever imagined. We can be friends with people who disagree with us, people who like music that sucks, and people who are bad drivers. And elitism is the vehicle by which we come to this new reality (not to mention it let's us feel like we're better than everyone else in the process).
Wow, your post reminds me of one of those medicines with really bad side effects. Elitism is what makes America great? Man, that is sad. The side effects are racism? Even sadder. Is elitism really worth it? How can elitism allow us to truly know those who are different than us? Elitism excludes and segregates in ways that do not allow people to become close enough to anything about the other person.
I think there is a giant amount of sarcasm and irony that is lost in the great world of internet publishing.
While I do not frown so strongly upon educational elitism, I do not advocate racial or cultural elitism (at least from other countries that don't know that America kicks ass).
I am crazy, but not that crazy. In fact, I'm well aware of your "comment" wars with my sister, and I believe that you have feigned misunderstanding of my post to run up the score. For shame!
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